Kirsty

I was going to do a blog post on my photography of 2010 but before I do there is one bit of my 2010 that I'd like to write about and honor.

My twin (and best friend) got married earlier this year. This is a difficult one to talk about due to the fact that I don't believe anyone will know what that feels like to go through unless you are an identical twin. A sort of detatchment takes place if that makes sense. And for the first time in my life I feel like I've flown solo. That sounds like it's all been very liberating and exciting, but it was darn scary at first. Kirsty and I have always been extremely close and where you would find one, you would find the other.

We went to the same schools and we were in most of the same classes so we had the same friends. This year I can officially say that Kirsty has a whole set of new friends that I've never met and so do I. So when I do get introduced to some of them they get a bit of a shock because they've met and got to know Kirsty as simply Kirsty, not Kirsty and Carly. So to be introduced to someone who looks a bit like her, sounds exactly like her and has all her mannerisms is quite a mind blower but it amuses us greatly.

I look back on Kirsty's wedding day with a sense of sadness as I feel like I wasn't entirely there and experiencing it. There is no photo of just her and I together. I find that insane. 28 years of being stuck together in photos and on the most important day of her (and our) life and we forgot.

However there is one moment that a friend caught on camera for us. The DJ had called Mr and Mrs to the floor for their final dance. All the guests came to the dance floor and created a circle around them as they began to dance to Frank Sinatra. And it was that exact moment as I watched my sister dance with her new husband that the realisation hit that the best person I will ever know was now married. Our lives were now seperate. When that moment hit me Kirsty found me in the crowd and I took this photo with our dinky family camera. What I didn't know at the time but found out later was that the realisation had hit Kirsty at the exact same moment.

Tears came out of nowhere and thankfully my friend was standing beside me and just grabbed me into a massive big hug. And then I heard her calling. I looked up and she was calling me out to share the moment with her and her husband. At first I thought she was insane, why of all moments would she want me to join them on their final dance. But she kept calling and before I knew it it was the three of us together.

And it was then that I truly knew that things were exactly as they should be. Kirsty was now married to a guy who absolutely adores her (he even cooks and does his own ironing!). He also understands the whole twin thing. He understands that there are moments that Kirsty absolutely has to speak to me and just be in my company for no reason at all. He understands that I may show up on their doorstep at any given moment and he understands that if we all go to the cinema together Kirsty and I will automatically sit together ;)

After 28 years I've also learnt to say 'I' instead of 'We' ;)

Kirsty, I know I wasn't the one to calm you down on your wedding morning, and I wasn't the one to help you into your wedding dress. But I will be forever grateful that as I stood beside you at your wedding ceremony you grabbed my hand. I will also be eternally grateful to our brother in law for catching it on camera. Our one photo of just you and me on your wedding day.

Love you xox